谈恋爱是找一个你爱的人还是爱你的人呢？

　　fenshouhounanshengxiaoshilaizenmeban？zheishihenduorenmenzaihunyinpoliehouzuijingchangtiwendewenti。dangmianduinanshenghuranxiaoshideqingxingxia，diyibushipingjingxialai，buyaoxianruqingxudezhaozezhong。xiamian，yaoshizheheduifangjinxingjiaoliu，xunqiurenzhihejiejuewentijiyu。ruguobunenglianluodaotamen，keyixuanzexunqiuwaibudezhichiheguli，biruyuqinyouxianliaohuoxunqiujishuzhuanyedexinlizixun。yucitongshi，xuyaoguanzhuzijidexiangfahexuqiu，jinxingshidangdeguanhuaidiaojie。zuizhuyaodeshi，buyaofangqixiwang，xiangxinshijianhuizhiyuyiqie，erninengzailichengzhongbiandegengqiangda。

　　阶段一：解决情绪

　　fenshouhounanshengxiaoshilaizenmeban，fenshoushiyizhongjingshencengmiandewaishang，ernanshenghuranxiaoshigengzengtianletongchu。zaizheiyangyigejieduan，jiejuehaozijiqingxushifenzhongyao。fangsongxinqing，zhaodaoyigesimidekongjian，lingtingzijineixindeshengyin。chouqi、naonuhuoxinhanquanshiqingxushifangchulaidexingshi，danbuyaoxianruzaiqizhong，nulirangzijideqingxuhuodejunheng。

　　阶段二：深层次思考

　　fenshoudeyuanyinjinanshengxiaoshizhongjianhenyoukenengcunzaimouxieguanxi。zaizheiyijieduan，bixuweizijidexingweiyuqingganzuochusikao。bingbushisuoyoudeyiwudouyingyouzijifuze，danshizhelejieduifangdelichangshishifenzhongyaode。genjusikao，ninenggenghaodelejiezijiyudiaozhengziji。

　　阶段三：试着沟通交流

　　yunanshengzaiciqudelianxibingchangshichuliwentishixiayibudezhongyao。tuisongyitiaojianjieerzhenzhideduanxinhuodianziyoujian，biaoshunideyuanwanghexiangyaolejieduifangdetaidu。zhiyaoduifanghuiying，jinkenengbaochilixing，tanrandibiaodazijideganshouyuxuqiu，tongshiyeweilingyifangfabiaoyijiandehaojihui。

　　阶段四：亲朋好友适用

　　zaineiduanjiannanshike，womenxuyaoqinqipengyoudezhichihelijie。yuhaoyouhuozhejiarengongxiangnideqingxu，zhengqiutamendeyijianjianyi。tamennenggouweinitigongbutongdekanfayuzhichi，bangzhuzijiconglingyigejiaodukandaishiwu，bingqiezaijiannanderilitoujiyuniguanhuaihewenxin。

　　阶段五：技术专业协助

　　jiarunijuedemeifaduziyirenjiejue，xunqiujishuzhuanyexiezhushizhengquedexuanze。xinlixuezixunshihuokangfushinenggoutigongqingxudalizhichihejutizhidao，bangzhuzijilejieheyingduifenshoudailaideshanghai。qingtunidetongkuhedanyou，yuzhuanyerenyuanyiqizhidingyigexiufufangan，manmanhuifuzixinyujixuqianjin。

　　阶段六：自身关怀

　　dangmianduixintongheyihanshi，buyaowanglezhaoguziji。jizijiyixieshijianfangsonghexiufu，xunzhaoyixiekeyidaijinikuailehechengjiuganhuodong。jianshenyundong、yueduwenzhang、lvyoudengdengdounenggoubangzhunijiejueyoushang，zaicifaxianshenghuodemeihao。

　　阶段七：接受并再次

　　wulunfenshoushibushinenggouzhongxinxiubu，nizuizhongbixumianduixianshibingxiangqianzou。bunengrangneiyiduanaiqingdejieshuzuoniqianxingdezulan，xiangxinshijianhuizhiyuyiqie。jienaneiduanjingli，shizhiweichengzhangdejihui，bianchenggengjiajianqiangdulicengjingdeziji。

　　汇总

　　fenshouhounanshengxiaoshilaizenmeban，dangnanshenghuranxiaoshihou，womenyaozuixianjiejuehaozijiqingxubingshenshizijigerenxingwei。shizhejianlixindegoutongjiaoliu，tanxunqinqipengyoudeshiyong，ruguoyouxuyao，xunqiujishuzhuanyexiezhu。suihou，zhaoguhaoziji，weizijishizhanglaibaochihezhongjian。zuizhong，jieshouhejixuqianxing，jianxinmingtianhuigenghao。buguanjingguozenyang，fenshouzhihoudenanshengxiaoshidoushiyigejingyanjiaoxun，keyibangzhuwomenchengzhang，bingzhaodaoheshideshuyuzijidexingfu。