夫妻之间该怎样掌握冷战的尺度

婚姻生活 怎么过?对许多夫妇来讲，两人发生争执时，最立即的宣泄方法并非“拼杀”，只是进行冷战。

 dangliangrenyongyoufenqi，yifangxinyilunbaichengyifu“wozhihouhennanbulini”dezishi，lingwailingyifangxiangzhe“bulijiubuli，sheipasheia”，sheidouburenrang、sheidoubutuoxie，yinci，lengzhanbaofale。(hunyinshenghuozenmeguo?fuqizhijianzenmexiangchu?

 “wohewoshuohuadeneishihou，tayizhichenmobuyu;tayoushihouhuichaoxiangkanyiyan，danmuguanglengbingbing，burongyizaiwoshoushangzhiliuzhangshijian;gongzuo、yongcan、rushui，tadouyuwofenlilaizuo，youshiningyuanwandaodoubuyuwozuotongyibangonggongqiche……”meiyicilengzhan，wodeyigehaogemendoushisidixiagenwomaiyuan，“tashizhongdouburongyigenwochao，quezishizhizhongduiwomenshuodehuashierbujian，taneiyangzaoyikuaiyinianduole，youshiwoyizhiyubuqingchuwojiujingcuozainaer。”

 buyuanchuqianjitamaibaomaixiezi，nvpengyoubianhetalengzhan，yilengjiushishuojiri;kanbushunyantawandao，nvpengyouyehetalengzhan，yizhanjiushishuojiri;daozhihouliangrentongjushenghuo，lengzhandepincibianhenduole，dadaogouchemaifang，xiaodaoyongcankandianshiju。wozheiyipenyouhenvpengyouxiangchule4nianshijian，xiangbudaozuihouquezailengzhanzhong“xisheng”。

 nvxingyikaishiqidonglengzhan，zhibuguoshixiangchufayixiananpengyou，xiangzhedengtaqueshichengbuzhule，bianhuibaobeiguaiguaixiangzishenfancuowu。shide，zheileifangshijianghuiyici2ciyouyong，nengyongdepinciduole，bianbuhenlingle。

 zaizhangqixinglengzhandequanguochengzhong，nanshengzaoyimanmanchanshengjiejuelengzhande“kangyuan”。nileng，yinweiwoleng;wobutuoxie，yinweiwobuqiuhe。yidanlaidaozheileichengdu，nvxingbianmeibanfazailengzhanzhongzhanjuhuasuan，fanerlenglenanrenxin，weihailebicideqinggan。zhangjiuyiwang，tichufenshoushizaozhongwandeshi。

 congwangmindexiexinzhong，wochangchangjiandaolengzhanzhongdenanrennvren，wulunnayifang，xinlidoushiwubideyoushang、qinao、wukenaihe，youdejiangnantifuza，youdeyizhiyuxiangqiletichufenshou。

 haowuyiwen，lengzhanquanshishangganshangshenzhiside：liangrensheqilegoutongjiaoliu，xintainanyixuanxie，yongpaijidefangfachufalingyifangdelingwai，yechaimolezishen;liangrentaobimaodun，bingbudengyunenggouchedixiaochumaodun，meiyouhelidegoutongjiaoliu，maodunrengshiyikedingshizhadan，zhongjiuhuibixubaofa。

冷战的最佳时机和尺度

 yingduinanshengdeyixiebuliangxiguan，ruoxiaozhiyilidongzhiyiqingbukeyijianxiao，chaonaodahanyebukeyitahuijiechu，zheishihouniyuqishuoshiyixialengzhan，tahuishoulianxingyixie。danshi，xuyiyonglengzhanranglingyifanggaizhengyixiebuliangxiguan，nihaiyaorenzhunzuijiashiji，bawohaochidu。

 zuixianyidingyaoranglingyifangqingxi，niyeshizainaxieshiershangcaiduitalengdande。jiarutachangchangyouhuiwandao，neimajiuyingdangchenzhetamouyiciwandaodezuijiashijigentanaofan，erbingbushizaihetazhengchaowanfanchishenmedeneishihou，qianshedaowandaodeshier，yinciniyuexiangyuebiemen，suihoucaixianggentalengzhan。

冷战并不是争霸，有目的性的宣战才可以他会尽快自身改正错误。

 lengzhanbaofa，jiexiaqunibixubakongdejiushishuolengzhandechidu。heshishouwei、ruheshouwei，zheizhongnantiniwubishiqianshuaxinyanhao。

 buhetapengmian，dannikeyiquebao24zhongtouqidong，bianyutanengsuishisuidixunzhaoni;buhetashuohua，danninenggenjubiedefangshibiaoshuzishendetihui，tahuigaoqingchuninaonudeyuangu，liruqqqingkuang、boke、xinlangweibohuoshipenyouzhikou，fangzhitasuiyicaixiang，ranggemoyulaiyushen。jiarutajijixiangnituoxie，nihaiyaojitamenyigelouti，rongtabiaoshu、gaidiao。

缄默比争吵很糟

 liji、helidigoutongjiaoliu，haowuyiwenshihuanjiemaodundefangfa。meiyounaduiqinglvganshuo，tamencongmeizhengchaoguo。dangniyongmeicuofangfa、zhangwohaochidu，zhengchaobujinnenggouchulimaodun，keyitigaoliangrenzhongjiandexinyoulingxidu。

 huoxu，qinglvzhongjianhuanjiemaodundequanguochengtongchangmeiyoushuodeneibanjianyi、pingjing，youshihouyizhiyuhuibansuizhengchaoyizhiyudama，pengdaozheileiqingkuang，renmenhebuxianlizhiyixia，jixianghushijiansisuoshierdelailongqumai。

danjilao，zheileilizhibingbudengyupaiji——fenqimeiyouchuliyiqiansheiyebulishei。

 yitiaoheshang，youyizuodumuqiao，dumuqiaoshangzhiyourongxiayirengenju，liangrenyingtouzouguo，zenmecainengshiliangrendoushunliwancheng?jiarunishibeigaofang，ninengshuodonglingyifangjinixianguo，haikeyizhengchaoyihoutanchuyouxiaodeguiding，huoshiguoduanzishentuoxieranglingyifangxianguo;danjiaruliangrensheidoububiaodayijian，neijieguozhiyoushiliangrendoulengzaiqiaozhengzhongjian，sheiyetongguobule。

 jianmohepaiji，shishizhongyenanyijiejuenantide，jianmodeshenhou，shishishangyanzangdeshinaonu，kucunjiyadaoyidingshuiping，naonujiuhuixianghuoshanshipinbanbaofa。

退一步，这些都是小问题

 lengzhanyituozaituobuwanbi，liangrendeqingganbianhuichuxianweiji，jiusuanshilianqingliangniande“laoqinglv”，doushijingbuzhulengzhanxiazhetengde。

 nvxingchangjuede，jijidapojiangju，jidaibiaozishenzailengzhanzhongbaitui，renweiciciyabuzhuta，xiayicitabianhuidecunjinchididuini，zaijianglaidefuqixingshenghuozhongzishenyehuichuzailieshiyingxiangli。

 keyichanglengzhanqueshiyiweizhebushangguoduo，yaoshizishenxinliyoushu，lingyifangyebutaikenenggenjulengzhanlaijinituoxie。liangrenyiqiyishizhuxing，guanjiandebingfeishengfu，zhishizenmezuocaikeyihuligongying，liangrenkeyihehaoruchu，caisuanshizhenshidehuosheng。

 ruguonizaoyichengdanbushanglengzhandegudu，huoshilejiedaozishendebuzhengqueshi，hebuxinyilunmingquetichudiaojie，jinkuaiwanbizheicilengkuwuqingdezhanshi。

 lengzhanyihounijiuhuifaxian，liangrendangshidexinyoulingximeibanfazaizhaohuijiale，youyuxianghudoumanmanrongrulehushilingyigerende“danshennannv”yishizhuxing。

 erzhanjieshuqianqi，liangrendouxianglurenyiban，guoqudeqingganheshentigoutongjiaoliuhaowuyiwenhuirangxianghujuedenankan。cike，niwubixinyilungaohaozhengqueyindaodegongzuozhong，zhuangzuoyipiankongbaichanshengguo，jijihetaxianliao、shizhijinkou、youhui、zhongguiyuhao。

 meiweikekoubunengduoshi，jianiangbunengduoyin，yiyang，zaigaomingdelengzhanzhaoshu，yongduoleyeburongyiyouyong。lengzhanzhuzhongchidu，qingganfangkebushu。fuqizhijianzenmexiangchu?