婚姻里的第三者，真的那么可恨吗？如何处理第三者关系

 xuduozhengshilaopodoutaoyandisanzhe，ganjueyaobushitayinyouzishendezhangfu，hunyinshenghuojiuburongyiqianchuangbaikong。ruhechulidisanzheguanxi？tingjiandisanzheyeshishouhairendeguandian，bianhuihenbuxieyigu。xuduozhaowoliaolaizhidaodezhengshilaopohewojiang：“ta，wolaogongzhongguile，neishihouwohaishiyaoxiangduifudisanzhe。”chulidisanzhezuihaofangshiyounaxie？

 shijishangzhengshimenyouneiyangdexinlizhuangtaihenyiqiezhengchang。zheibiaomingnizaiqianyishizhonglirengzaifushang，bingmeiyoucongzhangfudepanbianlichedizouchuqu。keshiwoxianggaozhiquanbulaopodeshi，jiarunizishizhizhongduidisanzhebaoyouzenghenhechengjian，jishinizhangfuzhongguile，heqingrenduandiaolaiwang，dajiadehunyinshenghuoyenanyijianchixiaqu。

hebudajiahuanyigeshijiaoquduidainizhangfudepanbian。

nijuededisanzhebingbushishouhairenma？

 disanzhezhenzijintouruleqingganyezhengyouyuzheiban，tamencaihuizaiganqingbuchenggonghouhennanguo。wulundisanzheshiyijingjiehunhuoshidanshen，tadelianrenshiqiannanyouhuoshishengshunansheng。fenlihou，tahentongchu。

 ruhechulidisanzheguanxi？zaiqizhong，youbaifen80dedisanzhequanshibeiyijingjiehunnanxingjiyoupianle，shubuzhizheizhongnanshengdefangfafeichangjiandan，jiuhedisanzheshuo：“wodehunyinshenghuobingbuxingfukuaile，wojinqizainaoliyi。”

 danshishishangjialidelaoporengzaitianmeidexiangxiangli。erdisanzhetingjiantashuodaolihunle，jinjinlaopobuyuanli，bianhuijuedezishenhenyoufengcai。nvxingzhendeshiganxingdongwu，zhiyaoshizheiyihunwaiqingrenbuliaobo，disanzheyebuhuiqianxinwankudengtahaoduonian。

zheizhongkeyiyouyunanshengdeyiliangjuhuayanqiaoyuershangdangdenvxing，zuizhongyehuibeiqingchanshen。

 zheizhongnvxingyouyigeyitongdetedian，bianshiganaiganhen。youdebeidisanzhehewojiang：“ta，nikuaibangbangmang，zenmecainengjiejueneigerendecaozong？”

xuduodisanzhehewojiang，zheiyinandekanqilaihenyoufengfan，yehenfuyou，tayoumogaoxiaonengdouwogaoxing，yinci.woaishangleta。

 zheierhelaopomenjianyi，wanhunyihoujiarunifajuenizhangfudepinpaixingxiangfeichanghao，gesanchawudiwaichuhaihuijixupenxiangshui，shulitouxing，jiaokouxiangtang……zhuyile，tazaiwaimianyidingyongyouxindeganqing。

cengjingdewozhidaoyigeanjian，disanzhezaifangchanzhongjie，zuozheyifenyibangongzuozhong。

nanshengzhujianzufang，shijishangtamenjialiyoufangwu，keshitazuyitaoyouqigaoduandefangwu，yigeyuewuwan。

 nanren40duoshaosui，bidisanzhedaershisui，takanqilaifengliutitang，neishihouwokandaozheiyinanrendezhaopian，wohaiganjuezheigenanrenqueshitingshuai。

 tamenliangrenyilaierqu，disanzhejianjiandizhangwodao，zheigenanrenconghaiwaiganghuijia，shijishangtashizhongguoderen，suihoubandaohaiwai，zaifanhuizhongguo，houbianyoushouquanweituodisanzhemailaijishenfangwu。

taxiashouyoudaqi，wenpingyougao，yeshiqiyedekonggugudong，yincidisanzhexiaishangneiyangdenansheng。

disanzhejiandaotachangchangyigeren，xunwenta，“nishidanshenma？nililehunma？”

tashuodao，“wohexifudeguanlianbutaihao，yinciwolianglilehun”。

 suihou，tayoushuoxifushiduomedekeederen，tamishangdisanzhe，youzanmeixiaonvhai，“nihenzixi，nihenhuigan，nihentiexin，nihenhuizhaoliaoren”，jiushizheiyang，disanzhegennanshenghunlewunian。

 zaidiwunianshi，disanzhezaoyisanshisui，tadexifufajuelezheigenanrenzaiwaimianxiangaiderendeshier，youyutamenshenglesigexiaohai，xifuyixinyiyimangjiazhongdeshier，ouranfaxianzishenzhangfuchulenanti，jiuhuomaosanzhang。

xifuzhujiandiaoyandisanzhe，fajuedisanzheshibangtamenjiamaifangdenvsheng，tamenjingranlejie。

xifuguidingtamentichufenshou，tamenbuduantichufenshou，youbuduanfuhexing，tamenyougaolesannian。

 disanzhecongershiwusuiyizhigaodao33sui，rujindisanzhezhaowoliaozhidao，jiarutamenbufenshou，tamenfufulihunle，tashifentongchu。

 tajiang，“wozaiershiwusuizhujiangensuita，rujinwoyijing33sui，dabadeqingchunnianshaodouxiaohaole，bingqieyemeiyoucongzheigenanrenneiliqudebanjiaoqian，wodouweitadalejihuitai，tahaidaiwokanfang，shuozheitaofangwuzengjiwo”。

 hunwaiqingrenhaibangtahuanlefengongzuo，bataanchazaitamenqiyeligongzuozhong，xinzifeichanghao，tadezhiweitiejinyuguanliceng，zuoluoyuzhongceng。

 disanzheyeshiqueshiduizheigenanrendongleqing，tingerzouxiandibazijiquanburenshengdaoludalejinlai，tagenhunwaiqingrenbanian，meiyouyaoguotarenhedongxi，tanengbutongchuma？

haosinihezhangfuwanhunbanian，nilihunle，niyehuitongchu。

danshidisanzhebianshidisanzhe，jiusuanshizhenzhengdeaiqing，yetaobudiaobeizhengshilaopomiediaodeyunshi。

 zheiyidisanzheshuo，tapingdandeshenghuozaoyizaizhengshidexuanzhanliwanquanbeibaituole。tayelejietayingdangliqu，keshibaniandeqingganbushishuoxuehuifangxiajiuxuehuifangxiade。

 chixuzaiwozheierganledabanniandexinlizhidaohewaishangyuliaojianjiandihuanguoshenlai，yincinvxinghebidiaonannvxing，jiarunidehunyinshenghuofashengledisanzhe，qingbuyaoyiezhie，yidinglijiyingyongqiadangdefangshixuanzhan，jibaihunwailian。

 neima，zheizhonghunyinshenghuolidedisanzhezenmehuitongchuni？laopomenyidingyaolejietamenjiuchanbuqingnizhangfudexinlizhuangtai，caikeyichulihunyinshenghuokunhuo。

第一，投入了青春年少和情感

wozaiershiwusuigensuiyijingjiehundenansheng，rujinwoyijing30duoshaosui，wodemeihaonianhuameiyou。

wozai40duoshaosuigensuiyijingjiehundenansheng，rujinwoyijingbenwushisui。

bubijuedeershisuidenvhaicaisuanshiqingchunnianshao，60suidedaniangyeshiqingchunnianshao，tatouruzheizhongwupin，yiqubufufan。

disanzhetouru，shiyaoxianggennanshengchuangjiantuijindeguanlian，zheiyiguanlianbudishenzhang，tabianhuitongchu。

第二，图这个男人对她好

 youyixiedisanzhebutujinqian，tajinjinxiangrangzheigenanrenjitachongniheguishugan。rutongtamenlianaideqingkuangxiaduitahenhaoyiyang。keshi，danghunwailianhurantingzhi，nanshengzhongzhitouruqinggan，tamenjiucongcihuibushangzuikaishi，disanzhebianhuijuedehentongchu。

yiwangdefuwuchengnuohexingfudoumeiyoule，danshijiyizhongzaiyiqidekaixinqueruheyewangbule。

第三，寄予将来。

 quanbudedisanzhedouxiangxiangguozishennengbianchengshenainanshengdeweiyilaopo。nanshengyeyiqianfuwuchengnuojianglaihuihetaquqishengzi，huizaiyiqiyibeizi。danshizheiyiqiejiyudejianglaiheqidaidoushizaihunwailianfenliedeneiyikeyanxiaoyunsanle，yigerenjiaruhuranmeiyoujianglai，xiangdangyusilele。

第四，投入活力和才气。

 xiangshangbiandeanjianyiyang，disanzhezaifangzizhengzhongjianzuodehaohaode，zhuanyenenglifeichanghao，weihunwaiqingrenjinzhijinzemaifang，jinkenengbafangwushouchuhaojiaqian，haidaotadegongsishangban。

 tagangjindaodaonanshengqiyeshi，batafenpaidaozuiwuguanjinyaodedanweili，lijingtadeguanlifangfa，zheiyidanweizaochenglejingjixiaoyi。

tatouruzheimeduowupin，rujintayaoliqu，tayaobeiduozou，tahaowuyiwenhuitongchu。

 wodouzhidaobiededeanjian，disanzhebanghunwaiqingrenkaizigongsi，bangtakaijiangpitu，jieguochajuezijishangdangshoupian，haixuyaohetatichufenshou。

第五，投入真心实意。

zhenxinshiyishiyigehenchouxiangxingdewupin，meiyoubanfaxushu，dajiazuitongchudeyijianshiqingbianshizhenxinshiyi。

 wokandaonideqingkuangxia，worenweinishiwoxiangaideren，yikaishinijuedezishendanshen，houbianyoushuoniyizhizaihunyinshenghuolihuodebeiju，wotongtongkuanrongni，wotongtongkuanrongni，wohenizaiyiqi。chulidisanzhezuihaofangshiyounaxie？

jieguowodezhenxinshiyiweilegou，wotaoxintaofeiweitakaolv。

 tashuodaotadexiaohaizinianjixiao，yaowanyidianliyi，yinweiwoyuanyi；tashuodaoxifubutongyiliyi，xifuyiyuzheng，rangxifuerhaoyidian，zaitanliyi，yinweiwoyuanyi。

zuizhong，wofaxianlexifuhuaidiertai，huaidisantai。

第六，吵吵闹闹。

chaochaonaonaozuilacherendeneixin，nigaosuta，“woyijinglejienimengpianwole，woxiangyunitichufenshou，woxiangfangqini”。

 talikeqiunibuyaoliqu，“kuaijiwoshijian，wonengheqiziliyi；kuaijiwoshijian，woqiuqiuni，woqueshizhiainiyigeren，yemeiyouni，wonengsi”。

renshengdaoluzuifangandeshierbianshiniyaotichufenshou，youjiangwozhuihui，zhuihuihou，suihouyouyaotichufenshou……

 fouren，diuqi，jianlai，youzuoweishangpin，youdiuqi，tashicaita，pengzaishoushang，hanzaizuili，zuizhongyikoukoushuituzaidimianshang，haiyongjiaolaiyongjingcaiyixia。chulidisanzhezuihaofangshiyounaxie？

yinci，nikankan，hunwailianlidedisanzheyeshigekeliandenvren。

shuoqitacuozainaer，yongqingtaishen？jieshunantao？zhenxincuofu？

 kenengzaizhengshineibian，disanzheshigemogui，kelianzhirenbiyoukeezhichu。keshi，keederenbiyounanguozhishi。yincizaizheierzhenxinshiyiquangaozhuweilaopo，jiaruhunyinshenghuofashengledisanzhe，zuiqiadangdezuofashilixingdimiediaohunwailian，erbushiquyiezhie。

ruhechulidisanzheguanxi？disanzhesuiranyoucuo，yebixuqiadangdezhengqueyindao，rangtaxuehuifangxia。