婆媳关系心态咨询：婆媳矛盾怎么解决？

 youxienvrenhunhouxiangfujiaozixiaojingzhangbei，danshiwulunzenmezuopopojiushibuxihuanziji。xiamianjieheyige poxiguanxi xintaizixunanli，jidajiajiangjieyixiaruhechulihaopoxichongtu。

poxiguanxixintaizixun：weishenmepopobuxihuanwo？

网友 情感咨询

 woyebuzhidaozijishinalizuodebuhao，popojiushihenbuxihuanwo，woyizhihenzunzhongta。tayifulaoshibeitaxipolewojiujitamaixindeyifujita，wazipoleyejitamai，guomuqinjiejitamaiyifu(jiaqianbuhui，dandoushiyongdedongxi)。

 ganjuetalaoshibumanyiwo，wojuedetabuxihuanlaogongdenainai(yiqianhaibuzhidao，woshihoulainaolebieniuzhihoucaizhidaode)tayaowogentayiyangcairuletadeyi。laogongdeyeyehenzaojiubuzaile，nainaiyigerenzhu，juedetingkeliande，huaiyundeshihoulaoshilaikanwangwo，tajiuhenbuxihuannainaihewodeguanxihaoguowohetadeguanxi。

 zaihoulaitadetaidujiuyuelaiyuemingxian，zailaogongdejiejieneilishuowozheibuhaoneibuhao(tongguotajiejiemeicifapengyouquanheduiwotaidudezhuanbiankandechulai)。

 youshihouwohewolaogongbuxiaoxinweishenmeshiqingxiaochaoyixia，tabiaomianbuzuosheng，xinliquandoutingzhe。guanjiantayoumeitingmingbaidaodishiweileshenmeshi，tajiugaosutanver、meimei、mama、haiyoufujindelinju(shuohuatingqilaifengcideweidao)。

 youshihouwohewolaogongshuozheigewenti，xiwangnengtongguotalaibangzhuworongruzheigejiatinglilai，shuoyiciliangcihaihao，shuoduoletabuxiangxinpopodeneixiexingwei。weiciwomenyezhengchaoguo，yanzhongdeshihoutahaidongshoudaguowo，neigeshihougangzuowanyuezi，wohetatichulelihun，tahoulaiyouqiuwobuyaolihun。

 wozhidaotashipabierenxiaohuatafumu，yinweitahaiyougegege30suihaimeiyoujiehun，wodangshiyeshikanzaixiaohaihaineimexiao，xinjiuruanlejiubuzhuijiule。keshiwomenxianzaijiushimeihuashuo，tamamazhidaozheigegengcongzhongjiaosuo，rangtabuyaogenwoshuozhenxinhua。ru:youduoshaogongzibuyaohewoshuo、chuquwanyebuyaohewoshuo、fanshidoubuyaohewojiang，nengbuzaiyiqijiubuyaozaiyiqi……

 xianzaiwolaogongshihuanlefengongzuo，yizhoudingduohuilaiyici……(wohewolaogongshixiangqindeshihourenshide)jinglifangmianyemeirangtayouyali，lengailaoshibangbangwoba。

花镇情感咨询师冷爱回复：

 zaiwomendezhuanlancengduociyudaopoxichongtudewenti，meiyigepoxiguanxidewentidoubutaiyiyang。yinweiyigerenshimeiyoubanfazuodaochaotuoyuzishenguanxilaimiaoshuwentide。suoyi，ruguoshiyiyigexifudeshijiaolaiqiuzhu，neizheigepopoyidingshiwanede。

 kewokanguoletaiduodegushi，mingbaisuoyoudeguanxidoushixianghude，ernifalaideneirongyebuguoshinideyimianzhici。yushizhanzaiwairendejiaodulaifenxinimendewenti，jiuhuibiandebijiaokunnan。

 womenxuyaocongnifalaidesuoyouneironglimian，bolidiaoqizhongxujiade、youshuifendebufen，kanqingqizhongzhenshidebufen。suoyi，meicimianduipoxiguanxideqiuzhuanli，douxiangyicizuozhentandeguocheng。zaizheigeanlizhong，wokeyitigongsangesilu：

一，婆媳关系不是母女关系，改变你们的相处模式。

 keyikandao，nimuqianhaimeiyouzhaodaokeyihenipopohexiexiangchudefangshi，yemeiyouzaijiatingzhongzhaodaoheshizijideweizhi。gengzaogaodeshi，nibingmeiyouchangshiqugaibiannihetarenjiaoliudemoshi。

 biru，ruguonichangshiguojitamaiyixiedongxifaxianmeiyouyong，nimendeguanxibingmeiyoudedaohuanhehou，nikenenghuifaxiannizijiconglaimeiyouchangshiqulijieta。yinweitaxianzaizaizhongfuyunxingzhetadepopoduidaitademoshi，laiduidaini。

二， 夫妻关系 需要提高相处质量。

 dangnimeiyoudiaozhenghaokeyihepopoxiangchuhexiedemoshishi，nixiwangnidexianshengkeyibangzhuni。danshinishifouzhendefazineixindixiwangtabangzhunirongrujiatingni？woxiangxinnidangshidexingweiyinggaiyong“gaozhuang”laimiaoshugengtiejinzhenshiqingkuang。

 yinweinizijidoushuole“shuoduoletayebuxiangxin”，neinizaitamianqiankendingshishuolehenduotamamaruheruhebuhaoba。kezheishi“bangzhurongru”ma？zheishizaisuoqu。suoyi，nihenixianshengdeguanxikenengyemeiyouchulihao。

三，婆媳冲突的本质问题是夫妻问题。

 woxiangshuoyishuonanrendezhenxinhua。nijuedenidezheigepopohaoxiangzaijiaosuotagongzibuyaoduinitouming，waichuwanyebuyaoduinishiwujuxidihuibao，shishiduiniliugexinyaner，sihunidexianshengzhishitamuqindetixianmuou。

 woxiangshuo，wozuoweiyigenanren，keyigaosuni：meiyouyigenanren，huibaifenbaitingtamamadehua。zainimenguanxizhongsuobiaoxianchulaide，qishizhishinidexianshengtabenshenjiuyijingzuohaodexuanze。

 nixianzaisihubanidepopokanzuoshinimenguanxidangzhongdewenti，danqishizaiwolaikan，nideguiyinshicuode。nihenixianshengzhijiandewenti，caishizhenzhengdewenti。

 zongshangsuoshu，poxichongtudebenzhiwentishifuqiwenti，fuqiwentidebenzhiwentishiguanxidewenti，guanxiwentidebenzhiwentishilijieyubeilijiedewenti。

 jielinghaixuxilingren，ruguonizhendexiangjiejuepoxiguanxidewenti，haixiangwanjiunimendehunyin，neimejiuqingnixianshizhebingqiguoqubukeguandexiangfa、zuofahezhuyili。

 nixianzaibanidepopokanzuoshinidediren，erjuefeishinikeyiwajueheyikaodeziyuan，neinishiyongyuanbukenengcongtaneilidedaorenhezhichide。zhiyoudangnichangshizhezhuanbianzijideshenfen、lichangyujibenqingxu，shiqingcaiyoukenenghuanhe。rendeganjuedouhenlingmin，dangniduiyigerenxinhuaieyideshihou，tayidingnengganjuedao。suoyi，haishibazhuyilifangzaijingyingnimendefuqiguanxishangmian，zhongxinzhengzhiba。