【淘宝猎手】衣肩上的废物测试——你为什么不敢穿得很潮?

 danshi“fumianyingxiang”yejianjiankaishichengxian，biaomianfengguangdetongshi，tayejianjianshoudaoleyixie“fumianpingjia”。shouxianshigongsiliyiweimingxianduitayouhaogan，taduitayeyouyidianerhaogande，ciqianyishi“zhijixing”denvsheng，tashuo：

“nizenmeyechuandezheimechao，huaxindenanrencaichuanchengzheiyang。”

 xuanyangdangshijiuhuangle，zheizhongqingkuangcongmeichuxianguo，ciqiantashoudaodedoushizanmei，rengewanzheng，shengrenbandezanmei，jiuxiguanxingdizhaolegejiekou：

“zheishizhunbeiquxiangqincaizheiyangchuande。”

keyixiangjian，nvhaidangshiyouduoshiwang。

haiyouyiweishitadelingdao，neitianyijinmenjiuyoubeitashandao，bujindiaokandao：“aiya，bucuoma，chuandehenchaoe。”

beilingdaotiaocile，xuanyanggenghuangle，jimangchengqing：“meiyou，jiuchuanyixiaeryi”

keyixiangjian，lingdaoyeshiyoudianshiwangde。

 zaifuzhuangjieyouyijuhuajiaozuo“shirenchuanyifu，erbushiyifuchuanren”，minjianyeyouyizhongshuofajiao：“chuanqilongpaobuxiangtaizi”，shizhiyigerendeqichangjiayubuletadexinyifu，zheige“qichang”baokuo：zhitiyuyan，shentai，qizhi，shijuegexingdengyuyifudeqihedu，danbubaokuoshuohua。

 zaishejiaojie，yeyouyizhong“yifuchuanren”，shizhizheigerenguanghuichuanyifubuhuishuohua；huozhe，zheigerenyinweichuanshanglexinyifurelaileguanzhu，shoudaolezanyanghuofeiyiquebudonghuobuganhuiying，yinghehuohaiji，chengshoubuqizheishenyifusuodailaideshequnxiaoying。jiuxianghenduonanmo，kanqilaikukude，nanshen，liuxian，qiutd，dantayishuohuajiuluxian，xiangsi！youjigenengxiangzhangliangyiyangbadelelaoma，dangdelelaoba，zoudelettai，doudelezhongle，niaihetashuohua？youjigenengxiangfanyeyiyang，chengdeqiduodadezanyang，jiushoudeleduozaidedihui？

 yizhezaoxingshangdegaibian，benshidianzhui，weiwosuoyong，danbunengshinisuoyongyouwuqidequanbu！danyinweigaibiankuai，xiaoguomingxian，xiyinhuachinengliqiang，errangyixietongxuexinxiruokuang，gengrangyixieqieyuzhanshizijineixindetongxuezhaodaoleyigebifenggang。qienuodetuoniaozhaodaoleyigemaishoudeshadui，yigejingdiwanglizuan。junbujian，tadepengyouquanyuelaiyuehuali，yuelaiyueduoxingnanzhezhuang，xingjijiudian，jiuba，ktv，shenzhiyouyuelaiyueduomeinvyuanyutahezhao，quexianjiantayourenheshijiyiyishangpingchangeryouqudeshenghuozhanshi，zheishiyigeweixiandexinhao！taxianrule“jishudexianjing”，taxianrulezhuangshaliu，ta，beitadeyifuchuanqilaile！tachuandezaiyouxing，zaiyoufaner，ketawentidebenzhimeiyougaibian，jianlizaishadiaoshangdegongdianzaihuali，yichujita。

zheiweixueyuanmuqiandeqingkuangjishizheiyang。

 tayudaole“yijianshangde feiwuceshi”！zhiyoutongguolebierenshejianshang，niyijianshangde“feiwuceshi”，nicainengsuanzhenzhengxixingemian，zhenzhengjiayuqileniquanxinrenshengdezhanpao。

 qishi，guanyu“feiwuceshi”，yeshiyigetianbumandekeng。yinruzheigegainianzhihou，youxietongxuejiuzhongrichuaichuaibuan：tazheijuhuashibushi“feiwuceshi”？taneijuhuashibushi“feiwuceshi”？huanghuangbukezhongri，yibubumaibuchuqu，shenjingbingsidishijiandouzaice“feiwuceshi”zhongnianhualaoqu。qishi，duiyusuoyoude“feiwuceshi”，douyouyigewannengwanyong，wanbianbuliqizongdejiejuezhidao。

lejiezheigezongzhizhiqian，xianyaonongqingchu，hewei“feiwu”？

xiangzhidaogengduoguanyu“feiwuceshi”degainianhetaobaolieshoulaoshiguanyuzheigexueyuananlidefenxima？

不是没房没车没钱没地位，或者“没房没车没钱没地位”也都还不够，而是“喜欢她，却不敢承认”（不敢合理地承认，注意这个括孤）！
xihuanwoquebuganchengren，buganhelidichengren，woyaozheiyangdenanrenlaizuoshenme？zheijiushifeiwu！

 henduonanrenhunxiaole“buganchengren”yu“buganhelidichengren”zheilianggegainian，henduonanrenzaitadechengzhangjieduan，zaimengdongdeshiqi，douyouguoxihuanyigenvhaiquebuzhiruhebiaoda，bielehenjiu，biedaobiyeqian，caiguzuyongqi，pengzheyishuhua，daizheshengriliwu，chengshangsanjinbandechuangdan，dianyidilazhu，lahengfu，layiquanrenweiguan，henmangzhuang，henyueji，henpofuchenzhoudixiangtabiaobai，beiyouhaohuowuqingdijujuele，youxiaodexinlingshoudaochenzhongdedaji，xiukui，chouhen，zibei，congcizouxianglingyigejiduan，zaiyebuganxiangnvshengbiaodanapayidingdianerhaogan，shiketifang“xuqiuganguoqiang”。mianduinvshengde“ceshi”，bushizhizhiwuwu，jiushitaobi，jiushimomingqimiaodi“zidafengqu”。zheishichouhenmengbileshuangyan，hunxiaolelianggegainian，zaicichengqing：

“表达好感”分为两个层面：

1.nishikeyixiangnvshengbiaodahaogande；

2.niyaohelidixiangnvshengbiaodahaogan。

guanjianzaiyu“heli”erzidenanieshang。

haole，liqingzhihou，womenjiukeyishuoshuoruhetongguojibenshangsuoyou“feiwuceshi”zheigewanbianbulijizongdezongzhile：

jibenshang，suoyoudefeiwuceshidoushishitujiangnidezhuyiliyinxiangtaren,nizhixuzaijiangzheizhuyiliyinhuitashenshangjike。

 zheishifangxiang。fangxiangduile，shengxiadejiushijishudeshile。zheixuyaoqianrendejingyanjilei，yexuyaonibajingyanneihuaguochengzhongdeshuciqinshenshicuo——nideshangchang，wuketaobi，nibukerucirouruo。zongeryanzhi，congyuehuideyoushidaozhong：taxuyaoguanzhu。

haole，gaijiangjianglizile。womenkanhuixueyuandeduihua：

mm：“nizenmeyechuandezheimechao，huaxindenanrencaichuanchengzheiyang。”

 lingwogandaohenchayideshixuanyangdefanyingjingshihenhaipa，danzhuannianyixiang，jikemingbaile。tadezheizhongfanyingshizai“haoren”jiehenyoudaibiaoxingde。tamenzuohaorenzuoguanle，ziranjiuhuijuedetazairenjiguanxishangzuodegenghao，yuduifangguanxigengqinmi，gengnengqinjinguiweizhihou，duitadejiangshangyinggaishigengduodezanmei，zhiyouyirujiwangdilixingkuatazhenhao，cainengjiqitamenneitoubafuluofushiyanquanerdetuoyexianfenmi，zhiyougengdedeyimeizhici，cainenglingtamendemeihaoganjuerutongzuoshangyunxiaofeiche。keshi，zaizhongguorenquzhe，yinhuidejiaoliufeixingxia，renjiguanxidishidebiaoxian，qiaqia bushizheiyangzide。

 nikankanzhongguoguanchanghebangongshiwenhuazhong，nayigebushihudaigaomao，huxiangchuipeng，jishinimianduidemeiyigedouliejibanban，yousheijianguosheidangmianshuorenhuaihuade？yinweibushuma。yinweiqizhongruguoyounayigehenjiaozhende，feiyaonihaohaoshuoshuotanayidianzuodebuhao，naxiefangmianhaikeyizenyanggaijin，neibushijizijizhaomafanma？wanyihaiyouyigexiaoxinyande，tacongcijihenni，zhaojihuijinichuanxiaoxie，beihoutongyinidao，zenmebanya？fanbuzhema。erqieshuoxieniaitingde，dajiaaitingde，wanyizhenyougeshazihaizhendetebieaitinghaohua，zhendedanglezhen，haoshizuodeyuelaiyuejijile，neibushigenghaoma。suoyi，dangmianshuorenhuaihuashijianyuqichengbenhengaodeshiqing。dangyigerenfangqilefanfandikuani，zhuanerrenzhenditiaotini，shenzhiyouhaodieyanxiangxiangdeshihou，jibenshangjiushinimenguanxijinjiedebiaoxian，biaomingtakaishibubanidangwairenkanle。suoyi，haoyoujianbuchengminghui，zhihu“hundan”，cunlirenjiaoni“gousheng”，“goudan”，fumuduinideda，ma，e...“dashiqin，mashiai”mouzhongchengdushangdouyouyidingtadezhengquexing，keke。

女生尤甚。

“nizenmeyechuandezheimechao，huaxindenanrencaichuanchengzheiyang。”

 qiebushuotakaishishuoni“huaihua”，tahaikaishixiangnibaolutadefumianqingxu，niyinggaixiangkanjiantadedikuyiyangkaixin。yuzongbeikuadewanmeixiangsi，ruguonizongshikandaotadewanmeiyimian，niyeshiweinengdengtangrushi（kandaoleyehaibunengzhanzhanzidongxi，yinweiyehenyoukenengshizuowei“houxuanren”，tayijiangnifangqi）。tagennihaishibaochijuli，tazainimianqianhaishiweinengfangsong。wodelingyigexueyuanyibing，taxuexile“lieshoutixi”de《liaotiangongjudaotu》hou，nvshenghetafaxinxifadaobuxiangshuijue。jieguofazhefazhe，nvshengturanlaileyitiao：md，gangshuizhebeinichaoxingle[penhuo][penhuo][penhuo！（yuanlainvshengfazhefazheshuizhele），yibingtongxuehedeshoujidoudiaole！tabudongdenvshengzheishizaisajiao，yiweitabanvshengrenaohuole，buguwomenquanzuganjinhuifu：duibuqi！chaozhenile，wanan！——gangbarenchaoxingjiuche，xinshoumendeshejiaozhijuezongshizheimemomingqimiaoyubujiefengqingna。

 erxuanyangzheibiannvshengdezheigefumianqingxu，haiyouyigexiaocengci，jiao“danxin”，huangle。yuanxiannichuandetulituqi，meiyouqitanvrenhuikanshangni，takeyiduxiangnidejingshenziyang。rujinnichuandexiangyekongzhongshanliangdexing，gongsisuoyoutarenshidenvrendouduinicemu，diaokan，mingli，anli，qianyishilixiangyaoyinqinidezhuyi，taqiyoubulaxinnibeiqianglequ？danxinyourenjiangtazainixinzhongdeweizhibeishuaxiaqu？bingqie，zheijianshiqingfashenglemeiyou，tabuzhidao，suoyitayaoceni，nirangtadanxin，tayeburangnihaoguo，suoyi，tayaoceni。

 guanxidijinshi，daiyubushibianhao，ershibiancha，zheiyicengluojixiangxinbingbushihennanlijie。ruguoniyaoxiangyixia，jieyunigangjinruyigexinderenjiguanxijiuxiangxinshengyingeryiyangbeihehu，ranhoujieshoumolian，zuihouchengdanzeren，neijianzhishirenshengdeluoji。neitaderenshengshifouyaojiaojinini？sheidoubuhuimaomaoran，suoyibujianduandeceshiyesuizhierlai：

mm：“nizenmeyechuandezheimechao，huaxindenanrencaichuanchengzheiyang。”

gg：“zheishizhunbeiquxiangqincaizheiyangchuande。”

zheiyanghuidanvshenghuiyouduoshiwang？

 yilai“taobi”，buganzhishizijineixinxiangfa，nuofu！yiruwomenqianwensuoshuode：“xihuantaquebuganchengren”，eryaozhixiangdisanfang，taobikeyiyaochengdandehouguoyuzeren，feiwu！

 erlai“nihuixihuanqitanvren”。zheizhonghuidafangshizaizhuonanzhongshihenpubiande，zheihuirangnixiandexiangtiaowuzhudegou，roubaozirengdaonajiuwangnabianpao，younaibianshiniang。niguzuoqingsongbenyishikaiwanxiaodeneiyitou，shiguniangshenshendeshiwang。chengran，nanrenshihuixihuanqitanvrende，danhuidashang，niyaojitaxinxin。

“基本上，所有的废物测试都是试图将你的注意力引向他人（你把我推开），你只需再将这注意力引回她身上即可（我向你主动）。”我把这个宗旨放到课堂上，发问：“如果机会再来一次，你将怎么破？”但依然得到了这些五花八门的回答：
genjuzhuyujianfashenglianxidefangshi：“ni”xiang“wo”zhudongyu“wo”xiang“ni”zhudong，

haiyoubulihuiduifang，buzhijieyuduifangfashengguanxi，huayuzhongxinzhiluozai“wo”zhishang，

粗略分成三大类：

一．  主语是“我”

“duia，tongshidoushuowosao。”（rengbudeyaolingpai）

“woshizheimesuibianderen？”

“duia，wojiushihenhuaxina。”

“meibanfa，getianshengjiushizheiyang。”（guoyuzida）

yiyanbianzhi，jiancishengjidemuzhongwuren，zihaizida。

二．  “你”向“我”主动

（1）生涩派

“nibujiushixihuan（wo）zheiyangdema？”

“nibuxihuanwochuanchengzheiyangma？”

“nibujiushixihuanhuaxinderenma？”

“kanlainihaibushizhendelejiewo”（zida，momingqimiao）

“nizhishibeiwoxiyineryi”（henmingxiandeshengyishidezida，）

 xinshoumenxiangbudaogenghaodedaitici，zhinengqiangyingdishiyong“xihuan”，renjiazhishiyizhiduiniyouhaoganeryi，jishishizhendeduini“xihuan”，zailiangrenguanxiweidaoaimeizhiqian，qiangxingsikai，shifouxiandeyoudianyuepaodaichu，qiangjiayizhi，haiyouziyiweishini？

（2）娴熟派

“你有留意我？”

“（huaihuaidixiaodao）aiyo，beinifaxianle。”

“shibushiduiwoyedongxinla？”

“nichi（wo）cudeyangzihaitinghaokande。”

“shiya，niyaozhuojinwolou～”（henjizhideshaonian）

 zheixiedouhenyouqu，shenzhihenyoumo，shenzhikeyiheweiguanliruxuanjunhuoku，tiquchulailiuchuanchuqujixinshoupengyoumenzuo“jizhihuida”，“houxuandazhao”shiyong。zheixieyeshixifangyuehuiliupai，biru：minan，“jiaoaofengqufa”suoxiaidesiweifangshi：wozaiwoyoukuangjia，woziruotaishanweiranbudong，erdengfenfenpuxiangwo，henshuanghenmanzu，hensuperstar！danshi，dangwomenkaolvdao“yizhixing”deshihou，faxianzheixieshijichengshuxuanshoushiyongde，erzuanyanyuehuixuejiqiaodedabufenshizhainanyijiqingganfangmianderuozhe，suoyizheigeshihoujiuhuiguangfandifasheng“buheshi”dewenti，jiuxiangyigexiaonvhai，jicongcongdizuanjinleweitamuqinzhunbeidegaogenxie，wanlifu，moshangleyidaduinongzhuangyanmodehuazhuangpin……ertixianzaiwomenxinshoushenshangdeshishiyonglezheixieguanlizhihou，tamendepengyoumenpubianjuedetamenbiandeqingfu，guaiyi，ziwoganjuelianghao，jiansuankebo，bushuorenhua，yiqianhaikeyiliaoshangjiju，xianzailianpengyoudouzuobule。

 chengshuxuanshoushiyongzheizhongsilu，queshizaijizhi，youmo，xiaosa，laolianchengdushangbibenwensuotichangdezongzhihailveshengyichou。danshi，youmobushiyigepingdengdejiaodu，ershiyigezishangerxiadejiaodu，aiqingzhongtabushidejiaodu。queshi，haoxiaoshigenghaoxiaole，niquesangshileyigejihui，yigexiangtazhenchenghelidibiaodanidehaogandejihui。chengran，nikeyiliyongdezhiletaduinidexihuan，yinzangleniduitadehaogan，natalaikaikaiwanxiao，keyigengjiayouliyuniqianzhetazou，danshiyigenvshengduinidemeihaoqinghuai，taduinidexihuandebudaonidezhengmian，zhudonghuiying，tadeneixinduoshaoshiyouxieshiluode……xiangbizhixiayounenglirendesinve，wogengxinshangyongyoufalaliderenzaichengshideshenyenengjingjingdizhikai70ma。

 zainimeiyounenglideshihou，aiqingbushibeigongquxi，dangniyoulenenglizhihou，aiqingbushijugaolinxia，bushirangrenfushouchengqu，aiqingshiliangxiangqingyuan，liangxiangpingdeng，erqienizuoweinanrenyinggaizhudongdanxinzhuiqiudezeren，zhudongxiangduifanghelibiaodahaogan，zheicaizaiwulunshishehuixue，shengwuxue，haishirenleijinhuachudeaiqinglunlibenshen，doushideyuanman。

haole，duoshuowuyi，zhixiwangnengdongderenhuidong。

三．“我”向“你”主动

zheishibijiaoshihexinrenlianxidefangxiang。zaishijianzhongsuoyudaodewentidaduoshi：

shifoutaizhibai？（haogandudebiaodashifouheli）：

“yinweiwoxiangxiyinni。”（xuqiugantaiqiang，jiejinbiaobai）

“suiranhuaxin，danxinlizhiyouni”（taizhi，jiejinbiaobai。）

“duinibujinhuaxin，haihuaqian。”（dakuanya，dakuan）

“biechicule，woxiangxiyinderenzhiyouni。”（guoleyidiandian，jiejinyubiaobaile）……

或者：

“（wo）haibushiweilexiyinnidezhuyili。”（taiyouhua，qingfu，youkenengyinqinvshengdefangan）

“wojiushichuanjinikande。”（zheiyetinghao，“woweiqiuxiang”）

“（wo）weilerangnigengxihuan（huo：duokankan）woya。”（woweini，niweiwo，liangxiangjiehedebucuodeyige……

shifoutaiqingfu？（haogandebiaodafangshishifouheli）

zheijiujianrenjianzhi，jianyujutiqingjingle。

 zaiwokanlai，zhiyaofangxiangdui，jiujige；zhiyaojige，jiunengyong，xianshihuibangwomenweidiao。zuihouhaibixufuzhengdeyizhongsiweishi：zhuiqiushiyizhongzhangqideguocheng，bushiyijibisha。guofenzhuiqiuyijuhuadadaota，yijuhuajiunengtdtashicuowude。yinweiniyutacongkaishidaoquanliucheng，jiangyouwushucijiechu，duikang，zhuanhua，wushucidexianshifankuihuibangwomenweidiao。zhiyaofangxiangzhengque，yibanyebuhuiyouzhimingdecuowu，jiunengyukekebanbanzhong，manmandiaodaoyigeshiheniyutadeneigekedu。zuihouhaiyaoqiangdiaodeshi：meiyizhongjinengdezhangwodouxuyaoshucibenzhuodeshibai，juebuhuiyinweinibaodujinglun，yichuzhajiuyifeichongtian；yebuhuiyinweimourensongleniyijujueshajiuhuiquanchengyingxia。yeyourenjiangdaoliwodong，danwobunengnawodexindongnvshengdanglianxiduixiangya？ruguorenshengmeiyouyanxi，shengmingmeiyoutake two，weishenmebuneng？jihuizongshituruqilai，ranhoushaozongjishide，yanbichengdengwozhunbeihaoderenzhongjiangliantadeweibadoubunengzhuozhu。erqie，aiqingzhongzuidiaoguideshi，tawanquangengyoukenengbuxihuanyigewanmeideni，huozheqiangzhuangwanmeideni，quexihuanyigeshaoxianbenzhuoquezaimianduitashineimeyonggaideni。yinweineishicike，zuizhenshideni。

 suoyi，“lieshoutixi”ligengduodeshi“fangxiang”，ershenshaoyou“biaozhundaan”。wobuxiangnigangcongsiweidelaochonglichulai，youjinguhuiyigexindelaochongliqu：yanqianshiyiwangwujidecaoyuan，renjunchicheng，qingmojinghuang！dangranla，yixieguzhidekaoshidatizhe，yixie“nibixuzhengmingniziji”dechedihuaiyilunzhe，haiyouyixielengchaorefengdejuxinpocezhe，buhuifangguowo。haoba，woshuoyixiawodedaan，ruguoshiwo，jinxianyuwo，wohuishuo：“aiya，nibuxihuanya，neiwobuchuanle。womendouxuyaoyoujinbu，wozhishixiwangnimeicikandaowodouyoudianbutong。

然后，继续穿。

总结

womendeshenghuobujinjinshipaoniu，womenhaiyougongzuo，zuihou，dangwomenzaiketangshangkaifangduiyulingdaode“feiwuceshi”：

lingdao：“aiya，bucuoma，chuandehenchaoe。”

zenmehuidashi，faxiantongxuemenjingshishouqidaoluosanxiawuchuerjiujiejuele：

“向领导看齐！”

“jingenlingdaodebufa！”

“weilezanmengongsidexingxiang！”

“yiqiedoushiweilelingdao！”

……

fenfendoushi““wo”xiang“ni”zhudong”ya！

nikan，“paimaliuxu”debennengshiqianzangzaiwomenminzudejiyinlide，zhishizaimianduiwomenxihuandenvhaideshihou，zhangaile。

ps : benwensuiyuyizheyoumodadeguanxi，danjuebushijiaorenzenmechuanyifude，zaoxingwentiqingwenzhiqiu～